I realised I haven't replied to this...


I'm not sure what my primary love language is. I had a friend who was very touchy, and I didn't mind that, but was never a huge fan. One of my past boyfriends was the same... that caused a few issues! But now, most of my friends are not touch people... and I miss it! However, I don't think that makes it my main love language, as when I have it, I'm not the biggest fan!

I would probably say that Quality Time and Words are the main two. How did I figure this out? Process of elimination! I've talked about touch, and although I love doing Acts of Service, but I'm not a fan of having people do things for me. I'd much rather serve them! And Gifts? Well, not a big deal to me. Again, a past boyfriend was great at giving gifts, but they weren't what meant the most to me... Time was.

Ok having read a lot more of the book now and doing the love languages profile in the back, I'd say that my primary love language is Quality Time (which explains a lot lol) and then my secondary languages are Words and Physical Touch(I had a tie). In the profile I never selected gifts at all lol, I found that quite interesting... I guess being a student and moving around as much as I have makes you keep the bare essentials, anything else is recycled or left behind.

TC - my family has moved a lot, so, I think that's affected my view of gifts in the same way that you're talking about.

Yes, it is quite logical though. When I was younger, I think I used to keep things for a while(2-3 yrs +) because they were given to me, now if I receive something I know I'm not going to use if I can I try not to accept it and if that doesn't work I probably only keep it 2-3 months now if that long....

Hmm....I still accept the gifts, but I don't necessarily keep them long, or at least not keep them with me long. My little siblings give me some of the funniest gifts, but they're still special 'cause they were given to me by my siblings. My little room might not have space to keep them in it, but I keep them back at the family's house.

I have learned a lot about this over the past couple days. Yesterday, one of the radio DJs was talking about love languages and how he thought his wife's love language was acts of service. They have been married for 13 years and he never really understood why she wasn't just ecstatic about how great a husband he was. Come to find out, her love language is quality time, so every time he chose to do the dishes instead of sitting with her on the couch, she was feeling unloved.

Today, I realized how often the languages can be the enemy of each other. I had a two hour long talk with the woman I babysit for. I had organized a house cleaning project for her this past Saturday. I thought I was being a blessing. Come to find out, her love language is words of affirmation. Acts of service combats words of affirmation. Every time I did something for her like wash her dishes or vaccum her floor she saw it as me saying, "You are incompetent, so I have to do this for you."

It was a very eye-opening discussion. I felt horrible by the end of it. Here, this amazing work project turned out to be a huge burden to her...

Yeah, that does make it difficult. My parents can drive me up to school, so, I can take as much as I need to....but I brought way more stuff to school than I needed this eyar. :p

I don't really know what mine is.

I'm sort of all over the place. But I'm not really a giving person. Especially of material stuff. I'm a giver/love being given time. And memories. Not things.
Quality Time: There's nothing like making memories for me. That is the ultimate way to say "I love you" to me. By spending time with me. Me over all the other busy parts of life.
Acts of Service: This is how I love the most I think. I love helping in church with little kids, and just helping people when they need it.
Words of Affirmation: I really don't love this way, but I love when I am loved this way. I have one friend who constantly fits words of affirmation into convo's, making me smile. It makes me feel great.
Physical Touch: I love it, but it's not the most important right now.

I'm not touchy. I hug people to say goodbye or when I haven't seen them in a super long time (as in more than six months) but that's a quick hug you know. I don't like it when I'm talking with my Mom and we're both crying and she wants to hug or hold hands, then I get super uncomfortable. My mom says I better learn to like physical contact more or when I get married, it won't last long.

oh i know what you mean about the physical.. for me it depends who it is, like holding hands with one of my best girlfriends is fine, we`re both comfortable, but like if my mom or like someone i didnt know so well wanted to? i dunnoooo. but i dio touch people a lot,

I'd have to say that mine are:

1) Quality Time
2) Words of Affirmation
3) Acts of Servide
4) Gifts
5) Physical Touch